Day 510: 24+ hours

I'm so sorry to have kept everyone so worried. I have had the absolute MOST MISERABLE 24+ hours.

After the Chemotherapy (day 9) I started to feel just sick to my stomach. After visitors left, I had enough energy for my bootleg pedicure and just as soon as I finished that, I laid down to go to sleep because my stomach was hurting pretty bad. I could pinpoint the exact direction and did nothing but complain to the night nurse.

It felt as thought I had to use the restroom every 30 seconds.  I had to stay hunched over at all times and I couldn't even lay down in any way possible to find a 10% comfortable position. So the whole night, I laid as still as possible and took my ambien. I got an OKAY amount of sleep but then, the morning happened.As soon as I woke up my pancreas was all sorts of swollen....or so the doctors say. I just knew I had to use the restroom. I painfully made my way to the restroom and noting. I felt a little up for eating so I ordered some cereal (bad idea) and as soon as I finished that, I felt like I got immediate food poisoning. I wasn't sweating or anything just in a WHOLE LOT OF EXCRUCIATING pain in my stomach (right above the belly button).

So then after complaining endlessly and crying, the nurses started giving me morphine to off set the pain every 2 hours. But morphine is almost an instant action type thing and after about an hour and a half, the pain returned. On top of all of tis, I was still hooked up to fluids and having to make it up and about to go to the restroom.

So yesterday my day went like this....woke up...morphine injection...lay down...get "comfortable"....get up....hunch/walk to the restroom....more morphine. I also have the theory that all the insulin injections I was getting the past two days had something to do with it. Or just the bag of chemo was really that harsh.

So I'm sorry if yesterday you tried to contact me, I was so beyond out of it, if you did get a reply, I was probably high from all the pain killers. I didn't even turn on the TV, radio, anything. I also didn't eat at all nor pretty much drink anything for that matter. On a brighter note, my glucose levels were WAYYY down. THe nurses all day kept trying to get me to at least eat soup but the idea of food in my stomach was TOO MUCH.

So then last night, the same thing happened again. It was an overall uncomfortable mess and I found myself waking up and hunching in a ball sitting indian style in my bed. Luckily I had great nurses who kept onto those doctors about my pain level We got to the point that EVERY 2 hours my pain was rated 9 or 10 out of 10 and nothing would help except morphine.

So today when I woke up, I felt the same, my stomach hurts a little less when I move positions and since my doctors have figured out that when I say I'm in pain....i must mean I'm in pain....they're sending me down to get a CT scan and possibly an ultrasound to check things out. Okay well, I have been sitting for the last 15 minutes and I'm starting to get sick again.

I'm gonna lie here until transport comes to get me because that itself with take a lot of energy. :( :(

Please pray for me. I'll try to write more later.

kim