SO Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, I felt awful. I don't even want to talk about Thursday and Friday or Saturday...lol, but here it goes. I was depressed and I was crying all day. That's really all I remember doing "those days." I remember starting some antidepressants and anti anxiety that day even though my mom said no, they went ahead and started them anyways but I only took a dose or two of them. oh well. lol. So anyways, Saturday came and I forced myself to shower mainly because my hair started dropping, and I started to feel it and I just wanted it all off my head. weird I know that sounds but when you lost your hair you think to yourself, wow, I can really do this and when hair does come back it really grows back. :) So I didn't think anything of this. it's crazy because in the first stages you think to yourself....my hair is never going to grow back. But it does. So eventually, you learn to live through wigs and cry a river together. Eventually, you like wearing wigs all the time! I love them....Anyways, I washed my hair and rubbed it until it was wet and I was feeling a bit uneasy about the product. So I called my mom into the shower and of course she did it for me because I was just tired in general. Eventually we got it all off and then I was like, here....and gave her a razor.....and said, go ahead and cut the rest off and she was like....OMG KIM!! lol. She eventually gave in and my head was bald by then. lol.
So then afterwards, she said, okay let me know when you want your underwear and your clothes. So I said, okay and kinda sat in there until then. I got up enough strength to ask for my underwear and eventually got up and walked out and asked for my clothes. I got some on and then later asked for my nurse to get me my hook up (to my heart). They started to adjust to my 205 hook up advantage. which, i eventually got. So then I was like alrighty, after a shower I want to be hooked up to my heart machine....of course right? no. But I eventually had to so I did and me and my mom went outside. It was super nice outside when we went out and I ate some soup (home-style chicken noodle) and some crackers (that my mom kept throwing at the birds) and sat down and eventually ate with me. We had fun, b/c I eventually laid down and just relaxed.
The next day, my sister eventually came over and after talking all morning and being fed by deb....around 2 we told our mom that shes the escape goat and planted it in her ear in front of the nurse. deb left and our plan to escape was perfect! so we kicked our mom out with the keys and off she went. me and my sister went together and even got into the car together. we decided to go home and was eventually like I wonder if this thing cuts off if your out of range? no one knew so, i was like, alrighty.....eventually it took us about 10 minutes to get my seat back in the car. we went ahead to the apartment and when we got there, it smelled like cat pee. awesome right? so we saw eins, said hi and eventually got a few mishaps. lol. we checked out our order and cracked up the whole time. eventually an hour went by and my mom started freaking out and we left and went to sonic then back to the hospital. we had her carry in our drinks too. lol, then after that she started talking about feeding birds bread, running after birds, and eventually capturing them??
monday was weird bc i was so tired/exhausted from everything the day before. i just laid in my bed and went to sleep. my sister came back later that night and brought us some chicken nuggets. i only usually only eat 20 but this time i only ate 5, :(
Tuesday i convinced myself to only get lunch from the quiznos down the street. not too exciting but i'll take it! nothing else happened that day either. except my sister eventually came straight over from drill, totally changed in the car and skipped right over seeing my mom, lol, who was at her house. lol. she eventually came back and had tacos and taco bell nacho sauce. then she got us up and we ate and watched love it or list it, property virgins, and the big bang theory. classic!
right now its wednesday and i get to go home tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
if of course i dont run a temperature. :) so keep your toes crossed, fingers crossed, and pray i get to go to the state fair too!! yaayyy!!!
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